No I’m not talking to people being physically abused. This is verbal and mental abuse and we are all victims of it every day. How do I know that? Well because we are human. The problem is we are so used to it we do not consciously recognize it, and worse yet, we subconsciously think we deserve it! So who’s the attacker lurking in the shadows? It’s you. Your mind has 20 to 60 thousand thoughts a day and it is believed that 80% of them are negative. Many of those negative thoughts are pointed right back at you. Our minds have a simple thought and distort that thought based on perceptions and opinions, many left over from our childhood. Often our minds use that distortion to seize on an unconscious opinion we have of ourselves that is simply not true yet we live like it is.
Have you every missed your exit while driving and beat yourself up over it? How about when you never heard back from the person you thought you had a great date with? Have you ever said something you wished you could take back and you punish yourself by reliving it over and over again? Now if a friend came to you with these things you would say it was no big deal, just an accident or not worth it and not to worry about it, but we are not that forgiving with ourselves. So how do we start being our own greatest advocate instead of our own worst enemy? (You know what I’m going to say here, right?) Mindfulness. Through mindfulness and meditation we quiet that incessant mostly negative thinking and allow ourselves to have the space to not be the thoughts but be the OBSERVER of the thoughts.
By observing what we think about ourselves (and it can be brutal) we have the opportunity to debunk that thought, even laugh at its absurdity and truly let it go. Then there is a space to replace it with what makes you a light in the world. Acknowledge the person you are that others see in you every day. So give yourself a hug for who you are and know that you can be, do, and have anything you want in this life once you remove the attacker that’s holding you back.
By Jean Pomeroy, CMI, President/Founder Workforce & Lifeforce Meditations